Dear Journal -
As always, I think of you all the time, but life is always so busy for me lately that I don't ever have time to do this that I love so much! Lately, life has been pretty weird, I've never felt this way before and I don't know why, but there are days that I want to just run as fast as I can and never come back. Of course I have always felt this way, this is why I have moved around so very much in my lifetime and to be hones if I were 30, I would be living in Paris! OH PARIS!!! I will see you again next year and I cannot wait! I LOVED Paris so very much! it was New York but with both old and new! with a different language and a lot of history! Kings and Queens and all the things I love from the Renaissance period. Sometimes I think that I lived back then, but was only a peasant.
So journal, I have a lot to tell you but I'm really tired. I decided that instead of writing some long drawn out entry, I decided to post a poem I wrote in May of 2022. I am working with my therapist on learning how to trust and feel safe, feeling safe is within and if I can't feel safe within, then how can I ever feel ok wherever I am? lots of work to do journal! but each day is a new day to work harder on oneself and be better than yesterday. I leave you with my poem.....
Where are thou my Romeo!
One day, there will be no tears, no fears, no trust issues, no scary thoughts.
The sky blue and clear, the one, he will be near. I know somewhere out there he is, why is he always kept so far from me….
Where are you my true love! Will I ever feel your tender touch? I yearn for your true kiss, and all the moments that we have missed! I can’t wait to make you smile, I’ve been waiting for you for quite a while!
I dream of you everyday! How will you look? How will you smell? What will you say? Will my trust issues and fears drive you away?
Oh where oh where are thou my Romeo!
Are you on top of a mountain or out in the sea!
I’m tired of helping please come and help me!
Why have you been kept away from me?
I'll leave you with.......
More than a woman from the Bee Gees.
I love music and dancing! this is one of my FAVORITE classic movies. It was actually filmed in my old neighborhood in Bayridge Brooklyn NY. There is a scene where a car drives right past the last building I lived in. I noticed it the last time I watched the movie and it was so cool to see how that street looked in the 70's. I LOVE how they dance, such beautiful art dancing is!
