I started writing an entry the other night called 2011 recap and I couldn't get into my writing. I guess part of me is not feeling to inspired lately. I have been feeling a bit down for a few reasons which I prefer not to write on my public journal, but I will say this...... It has to do with a boy. Boys boys boys! they have been trouble to me all of my life! you would think at 40 my boy troubles would no longer be, but no, I still have the boy troubles. Please note that I say boys, because well the men that want to partake in my life are boys trying to be men.
I have tried a few times to talk to men my age, but they are just so strange. They don't know what they want either. I will accept a younger man not knowing what they want but when a man my age doesn't know what he wants, that's just crazy! or is it? are we supposed to always go around knowing what we want or should we be able to judge case by case? why do the boys chase me? I never get it or maybe I just prefer to not accept that young or old they all want the same thing! SORRY BOYS! your looking in the wrong place, TRUST ME! I have pretty much have given up at this point and I have to admit that my giving up feels good! I also am fully aware that I really really really am selfish about my freedom. I made a proposition to a boy/man and wondered after I did so if I had made the right decision. I think I did.
I had a great year! had so much fun met such amazing people and learned so very much. I have to say that 2011 was pretty good to me! the only crappy thing that happened was that I hurt my achilles tendon and have not been able to run as I was doing before, this made me very sad because sometimes even as I walk it bothers me. Other then that I don't have anything to really complain and bitch about. I have great wonderful supportive friends and family, I have a roof over my head food to eat and lot's of things to be grateful for. I can honestly say that although I had some pretty sad days through out the year, for the most part I am pretty happy and that's pretty ok in my book.
I don't do new year's resolutions, but this year I want to really work on my potty mouth. The thing is that during work hours I don't curse, but when I'm not at work I feel like I curse way more then I should and the reason why I know that I do is because my three and a half year old says things like, mommy you said a bad word! THAT IS NOT COOL! how can I teach her that she shouldn't say something that mommy is saying? So, for the very first time in a really long time, effective January first I will be starting a new year's resolution and that is to stop cursing! all inclusive in my writing.....OK maybe not in my writing since she can't read yet!
Whomever comes across this post, I wish you all the very best life has to offer in 2012. If you read my blog often then I want to thank you yet again for visiting my blog and supporting my writing, I love to do it and hope that in 2012 I can write really good important things that will in some way shape or form help you in some way or another. As someone pointed out to me just the other day, I AM CRAZY! but that is ok! because if I wasn't, then who could you compare yourself too to realize that you are SANE?
PEACE AND LOVE!
I have tried a few times to talk to men my age, but they are just so strange. They don't know what they want either. I will accept a younger man not knowing what they want but when a man my age doesn't know what he wants, that's just crazy! or is it? are we supposed to always go around knowing what we want or should we be able to judge case by case? why do the boys chase me? I never get it or maybe I just prefer to not accept that young or old they all want the same thing! SORRY BOYS! your looking in the wrong place, TRUST ME! I have pretty much have given up at this point and I have to admit that my giving up feels good! I also am fully aware that I really really really am selfish about my freedom. I made a proposition to a boy/man and wondered after I did so if I had made the right decision. I think I did.
I had a great year! had so much fun met such amazing people and learned so very much. I have to say that 2011 was pretty good to me! the only crappy thing that happened was that I hurt my achilles tendon and have not been able to run as I was doing before, this made me very sad because sometimes even as I walk it bothers me. Other then that I don't have anything to really complain and bitch about. I have great wonderful supportive friends and family, I have a roof over my head food to eat and lot's of things to be grateful for. I can honestly say that although I had some pretty sad days through out the year, for the most part I am pretty happy and that's pretty ok in my book.
I don't do new year's resolutions, but this year I want to really work on my potty mouth. The thing is that during work hours I don't curse, but when I'm not at work I feel like I curse way more then I should and the reason why I know that I do is because my three and a half year old says things like, mommy you said a bad word! THAT IS NOT COOL! how can I teach her that she shouldn't say something that mommy is saying? So, for the very first time in a really long time, effective January first I will be starting a new year's resolution and that is to stop cursing! all inclusive in my writing.....OK maybe not in my writing since she can't read yet!
Whomever comes across this post, I wish you all the very best life has to offer in 2012. If you read my blog often then I want to thank you yet again for visiting my blog and supporting my writing, I love to do it and hope that in 2012 I can write really good important things that will in some way shape or form help you in some way or another. As someone pointed out to me just the other day, I AM CRAZY! but that is ok! because if I wasn't, then who could you compare yourself too to realize that you are SANE?
PEACE AND LOVE!
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