Dear Journal:
I'm sorry, I have been a bit of a slacker with you lately, I feel like I have so much to tell you, yet I don't know where to begin or what to actually share with you. I mean I can share it all, but it's just a lot and all over the place, so I decided that I was going to share with you the most significant thing that is currently going on in my life. But first things first! the other day when I realized that my summer class starts next week, I kept getting knots in my stomach, because I am so nervous. I always get anxious and excited whenever a new semester is going to start, for a few reasons. One, it means I am getting closer to graduating, two, it means that I will be starting a whole new subject and a whole new lot of things to learn and study and third, I get excited about the fact that I will meet new people a new professor and just get all excited at the thought that maybe there will be some cute guy in my class that I can crush over. It's so much fun!
Speaking of crushes, there is something really important I need to tell you about journal. Well, it's not important, but it's sort of bothering me and I am feeling quite confused but yet have butterflies about it and am feeling weird about it because it is something that has not happened to me since Benjamin, remember him? http://jazzy-jazzysjournal.blogspot.com/2010/12/omg-my-first-blog-entry.html meaning, that yes I do like people from time to time and yes every now and then I find someone attractive and all that good stuff, but this one, this one is a bit different. Actually, there is a bit of history behind it so let me start there.
Once upon a time, there lived a princess named Jazzy. Jazzy was super duper awesome! she was smart, funny, cute and really really crazy. Non the less, even with her craziness, she still managed to live her daily life as normal as humanly possible, it was her secret that she was completely insane and therefore, she had to act each day as if she was a sane individual....... Ok ok... I am joking journal, there is no fairytale although I do hope to write my own one day. But seriously, let me tell you what happened. I know that I always tell you how I meet all these awesome people on line and how I will go on dates with some, and how I have developed feelings for a few people, maybe not like IN LOVE like how I felt for Benjamin, remember him? but like people that have been really special and meaningful and have left my life and taught me valuable lessons.
This one, journal, the one I am about to tell you about, this one is 100% REAL! meaning, live and direct and right in my path, like in my home almost literally! I will explain. Nearly 2 years ago, I moved to this awesome apartment that I absolutely love in Brooklyn. When I first moved there, I was either leaving or coming into my building and as I was doing so, THERE HE WAS! this tall, maybe about 5 foot 10 maybe 11 inch guy, thin, with a dark shadow beard a thin nose, short hair and the best set of lips you can ever imagine! When I saw him, the first thing that came to my mind was OH MY GOD! JUST MY TYPE! YUM! I could suck on his............LIPS! oh my goodness journal, did you just think I was thinking something else??? WOW! I would NEVER..... write about that to you! I have another journal for that! ok, so back to me and him and his sexy lips. After I saw him and that thought quickly crossed my mind, I would always see him and I can't remember why, but we would just always say hello. Nothing crazy, nothing for me to write about, just hi. I would barely ever see him and if I would, he never looked at me any certain way and what I mean by that is he never gave me that "look" like the look of attraction, like I could tell he wasn't thinking about sucking my lips. I never thought about it much but then one day, I am walking out and he is walking with this short Asian chick and when I saw that I thought to myself, OH! NO WONDER! UGH! why do they always like the short Asian chicks? and of course I looked at her up and down and decided she had nothing on me and thought to myself, well, now I know why he doesn't pay me any mind, he is happy and in love.
Time passed and I would randomly see him, and then out of no where, it turned out that we would take the train in the morning at the same time, so I started to see him at the same time every morning. When I would see him, he would never see me, it seemed as if he was always in his own world. From a far however on the same platform, I would look at him and think, NOW THAT'S THE KIND OF GUY I LIKE, man, he is soooo damn cute! honestly, to the average person, he is probably just an average guy, but, I am like I have said before, attracted to the weirdest people, I find things attractive that others would be like WHAT THE FUCK! so I don't know, let's just say that in my eyes, since I am crushing over him, he is EXTREMELY HANDSOME!
The other morning, and this is kind of wrong, but I needed to do this, because I just absolutely had to find out, additionally, it was totally random and not malicious at least not on my behalf, but the other morning, as I am about to walk out of my building, I see a shadow coming down the stairs, the funny thing is, that for some reason I just felt like OMG, that's him! yet I just saw a quick shadow, but I looked back and it was him and I got so nervous, which is so unlike me, but I got so nervous that I kept thinking what to do what to do??? like I needed to stall in order to give him enough time to catch up. So I sort of held the door but then realized that, that was way to obvious, so I walked out but walked EXTREMELY slow, making it appear that he was catching up to me just by "ACCIDENT" WELL! he catches up and says hey! good morning how are you? and I'm like hey how are you! I couldn't control the smile on my face that was as they say, from ear to ear, so I say good morning and we start talking and I am like, oh yeah, I saw you last time with your girlfriend and he's like, my girlfriend? I DON'T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND! and I'm like you don't? OH I saw you with an Asian girl and when I said that, he kind of avoided the whole topic and his expression said it all, and what it basically said was....... that is a soar topic! So I just continued to play it off and the conversation continued and we walked two blocks to the train and of course I get there and realize I had to buy my ticket to get on the train, FUCK! so I tell him to go on without me, so he says good bye, but then check it out what happened next!
I buy my ticket I go through the turnstile at the train station and guess who's standing there waiting for me???? IT WAS HIM! WOOO HOOOO! I was like OMG! he waited hahaha... so he looks at me and says, guess what? your good, you made it. So we both smile and walk down the stairs still much involved in the conversation. So here is what we talked about. He wanted to know EVERYTHING ABOUT ME! he officially introduced himself and shook my hand and asked me about myself, where I worked, what I did, when I mentioned my kids, he asked how old they were, and even said, I wonder if I have ever seen them? we talked about his work, he talked about the building what he liked disliked about it, and of course, I casually mentioned I was single! YES I DID! all I know is that I think I might of seen some sparks at some point, but then again the sparks might have been the excitement and nerves inside of me and my mind in disbelief that I was talking to the guy I have had a crush on unknowingly for over a year probably. Additionally, I couldn't believe how much he wanted to talk to me and know so much about me, I kept thinking wow! you sure do seem interested in knowing stuff about me, for a guy who barely noticed me before (because maybe he was in love) you sure do want to know alot!
I don't know! but this feeling is pretty fun! I feel like a young HS girl who wants to get pretty to go to school everyday, in case she sees the boy she likes! I LOVE THAT FEELING! so much fun! I guess only time will tell......
STAY TUNED JOURNAL! AS THIS STORY DEVELOPS!
I'm sorry, I have been a bit of a slacker with you lately, I feel like I have so much to tell you, yet I don't know where to begin or what to actually share with you. I mean I can share it all, but it's just a lot and all over the place, so I decided that I was going to share with you the most significant thing that is currently going on in my life. But first things first! the other day when I realized that my summer class starts next week, I kept getting knots in my stomach, because I am so nervous. I always get anxious and excited whenever a new semester is going to start, for a few reasons. One, it means I am getting closer to graduating, two, it means that I will be starting a whole new subject and a whole new lot of things to learn and study and third, I get excited about the fact that I will meet new people a new professor and just get all excited at the thought that maybe there will be some cute guy in my class that I can crush over. It's so much fun!
Speaking of crushes, there is something really important I need to tell you about journal. Well, it's not important, but it's sort of bothering me and I am feeling quite confused but yet have butterflies about it and am feeling weird about it because it is something that has not happened to me since Benjamin, remember him? http://jazzy-jazzysjournal.blogspot.com/2010/12/omg-my-first-blog-entry.html meaning, that yes I do like people from time to time and yes every now and then I find someone attractive and all that good stuff, but this one, this one is a bit different. Actually, there is a bit of history behind it so let me start there.
Once upon a time, there lived a princess named Jazzy. Jazzy was super duper awesome! she was smart, funny, cute and really really crazy. Non the less, even with her craziness, she still managed to live her daily life as normal as humanly possible, it was her secret that she was completely insane and therefore, she had to act each day as if she was a sane individual....... Ok ok... I am joking journal, there is no fairytale although I do hope to write my own one day. But seriously, let me tell you what happened. I know that I always tell you how I meet all these awesome people on line and how I will go on dates with some, and how I have developed feelings for a few people, maybe not like IN LOVE like how I felt for Benjamin, remember him? but like people that have been really special and meaningful and have left my life and taught me valuable lessons.
This one, journal, the one I am about to tell you about, this one is 100% REAL! meaning, live and direct and right in my path, like in my home almost literally! I will explain. Nearly 2 years ago, I moved to this awesome apartment that I absolutely love in Brooklyn. When I first moved there, I was either leaving or coming into my building and as I was doing so, THERE HE WAS! this tall, maybe about 5 foot 10 maybe 11 inch guy, thin, with a dark shadow beard a thin nose, short hair and the best set of lips you can ever imagine! When I saw him, the first thing that came to my mind was OH MY GOD! JUST MY TYPE! YUM! I could suck on his............LIPS! oh my goodness journal, did you just think I was thinking something else??? WOW! I would NEVER..... write about that to you! I have another journal for that! ok, so back to me and him and his sexy lips. After I saw him and that thought quickly crossed my mind, I would always see him and I can't remember why, but we would just always say hello. Nothing crazy, nothing for me to write about, just hi. I would barely ever see him and if I would, he never looked at me any certain way and what I mean by that is he never gave me that "look" like the look of attraction, like I could tell he wasn't thinking about sucking my lips. I never thought about it much but then one day, I am walking out and he is walking with this short Asian chick and when I saw that I thought to myself, OH! NO WONDER! UGH! why do they always like the short Asian chicks? and of course I looked at her up and down and decided she had nothing on me and thought to myself, well, now I know why he doesn't pay me any mind, he is happy and in love.
Time passed and I would randomly see him, and then out of no where, it turned out that we would take the train in the morning at the same time, so I started to see him at the same time every morning. When I would see him, he would never see me, it seemed as if he was always in his own world. From a far however on the same platform, I would look at him and think, NOW THAT'S THE KIND OF GUY I LIKE, man, he is soooo damn cute! honestly, to the average person, he is probably just an average guy, but, I am like I have said before, attracted to the weirdest people, I find things attractive that others would be like WHAT THE FUCK! so I don't know, let's just say that in my eyes, since I am crushing over him, he is EXTREMELY HANDSOME!
The other morning, and this is kind of wrong, but I needed to do this, because I just absolutely had to find out, additionally, it was totally random and not malicious at least not on my behalf, but the other morning, as I am about to walk out of my building, I see a shadow coming down the stairs, the funny thing is, that for some reason I just felt like OMG, that's him! yet I just saw a quick shadow, but I looked back and it was him and I got so nervous, which is so unlike me, but I got so nervous that I kept thinking what to do what to do??? like I needed to stall in order to give him enough time to catch up. So I sort of held the door but then realized that, that was way to obvious, so I walked out but walked EXTREMELY slow, making it appear that he was catching up to me just by "ACCIDENT" WELL! he catches up and says hey! good morning how are you? and I'm like hey how are you! I couldn't control the smile on my face that was as they say, from ear to ear, so I say good morning and we start talking and I am like, oh yeah, I saw you last time with your girlfriend and he's like, my girlfriend? I DON'T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND! and I'm like you don't? OH I saw you with an Asian girl and when I said that, he kind of avoided the whole topic and his expression said it all, and what it basically said was....... that is a soar topic! So I just continued to play it off and the conversation continued and we walked two blocks to the train and of course I get there and realize I had to buy my ticket to get on the train, FUCK! so I tell him to go on without me, so he says good bye, but then check it out what happened next!
I buy my ticket I go through the turnstile at the train station and guess who's standing there waiting for me???? IT WAS HIM! WOOO HOOOO! I was like OMG! he waited hahaha... so he looks at me and says, guess what? your good, you made it. So we both smile and walk down the stairs still much involved in the conversation. So here is what we talked about. He wanted to know EVERYTHING ABOUT ME! he officially introduced himself and shook my hand and asked me about myself, where I worked, what I did, when I mentioned my kids, he asked how old they were, and even said, I wonder if I have ever seen them? we talked about his work, he talked about the building what he liked disliked about it, and of course, I casually mentioned I was single! YES I DID! all I know is that I think I might of seen some sparks at some point, but then again the sparks might have been the excitement and nerves inside of me and my mind in disbelief that I was talking to the guy I have had a crush on unknowingly for over a year probably. Additionally, I couldn't believe how much he wanted to talk to me and know so much about me, I kept thinking wow! you sure do seem interested in knowing stuff about me, for a guy who barely noticed me before (because maybe he was in love) you sure do want to know alot!
I don't know! but this feeling is pretty fun! I feel like a young HS girl who wants to get pretty to go to school everyday, in case she sees the boy she likes! I LOVE THAT FEELING! so much fun! I guess only time will tell......
STAY TUNED JOURNAL! AS THIS STORY DEVELOPS!
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