Dear Journal:
If you know anything at all about Jazzy, you would probably know that Jazzy absolutely loves me some quotes! Quotes are pretty awesome if you ask me. Why you ask? Well, a quote is trying to put a point across in as little words as possible, and anyone that knows me at all, knows that I can't do that for beans! but I'm working on trying to write shorter posts, per my good friends request! Anywho, one day I was looking for a friendship quote and I found one that said that friends were our angels on earth or something to that effect.
This post is intended to be a brief summary of my friendships. I am one of those people that uses the word friend very loosely, meaning that I call quite a few people friends. However, I think that in my mind, when I say "Friend" and I am talking about a specific person, although I am using the term friend to describe that individual, in my mind I have a mental picture and a true idea of which category of friendship they fall under. I think it is safe to say that all people have various friends for various purposes. In this post, I am going to write about my day to day friends that I interact with on a constant basis and hope to describe in what realm of friendship they fall under.
Please note: these are my male friends, some of which are "virtual friends" that I might have never actually met in person. They are seriously my lovely Angels that I go to for all sorts of love and support... I love them all dearly!
Please note: these are my male friends, some of which are "virtual friends" that I might have never actually met in person. They are seriously my lovely Angels that I go to for all sorts of love and support... I love them all dearly!
The first Angel I want to mention is my friend from California named Michael. I met Michael over a year ago on Tagged (a dating website that kind of reminds me of myspace) What can I say about this amazing human being that has been in my life now for over a year? Michael is simply awesome! I tell him nearly all my sorrows and love stories and challenges and he is just always ready to hear me out. At first, it took me a little while to warm up to him because his initial intent was to pursue me romantically. So, after talking to him and being honest with him about the fact that I did not see him the same way that he saw me, we had a serious conversation where he assured me that he understood his place in my life (that of a platonic friend) and that he was ok with it. Since I have been led on before and I don't like to do to others what I do not want to be done to me. I waited until I was sure that he saw me as just a friend and thereafter began to develop the friendship we now share. I have video chatted with him (I don't video chat with anyone) but for Michael I will make the exception because he is truly awesome! he is this handsome, Tom Cruise looking young man from California that loves his movie collection (over 1,000 to date) He is a total and complete nerd which I absolutely love to make fun of and he makes fun of me. Michael has become quite the ladies man lately and I have the pleasure of being the insider and knowing all! One day I was really really depressed and I called him and cried to him about all my sorrows and he just quietly listened and allowed me to let it all out and after he gave me some great advice. He understands me, has never ever ever judged me based on the things I tell him, we have quite the friendship! I'm truly lucky to have this Angel in my life.
Next, is my one and only love Sean. To Sean, I play the role of therapist! I have helped him untangle some of his worst relationship drama. He pisses me off sometimes to the point that I want to yell but can't bring myself to, I once wrote a whole blog post about him and before he got to read it I deleted it by accident. He and I have known each other now for 4 years. I have seen him in person maybe three times because he lives in Virginia, but we communicate constantly. Because I'm in the process of deciding what area of Psychology I want to pursue my masters in, he plays a constant role in my decision making, all the drama that unfolds in his love life (he is in a relationship for a few years now) has not only given me the opportunity to give him some good advice, but I am learning that I don't think I want to be a relationship expert... that's just WAY too much drama! Yet he is encouraging and sweet, kind and loving to me, he is an intelligent man that understands life and is always ready to listen to my advice. He tells me that he really sees me as someone that would be really good as a relationship counselor and is also always always ready to listen to me when I need to make some sort of decision or am having difficulty or am in need of advice. He is one of my best friends who I truly value, respect and love.
Next is my awesome friend Chicho. I met Chicho over a year ago on Tagged (wow I have met some really great people on there come to think about it) Chicho initially approached me in a romantic way since Tagged is after all a dating site, but from the beginning I was honest with him and told him that I was not attracted to him that way and he told me that it was ok, that we could just be friends. I am aware that sometimes people think that staying friends is a good idea when you like someone romantically because they think they might have a chance of some sort if they stay friends (that is NOT true! and a really bad idea! don't be friends with someone you have romantic feelings for with hopes as it is not fair to you or the person) but with Chicho, I noticed immediately that he was capable of being a mature man and handling our friendship as a mature adult would. He understood that I was being honest and that I do not play games with people, he also understood that we had a great chemistry in that we had so much in common that it would be a bummer not to be able to maintain a platonic friendship with each other. I was really happy that he is mature with his feelings and that we could stay friends because he is really really awesome! he is intelligent and funny and easy going and just plain COOL! he is handsome and witty and educated and just great! I appreciate him very very much, because he never again brought up romance nor does he ever disrespect me in any way, he hears me out if I have a problem and I try to do the same. He tells me about the women he dates and I will tell him about my crazy man stories. We have met up a few times and just had a great time. I really love my friend and am proud of him because he is a kind hearted individual who loves photography and traveling and reading and being well rounded. He served our country in the military and is currently still serving his community by being a city councilman. He cares about people and has a great big heart! I'm truly lucky to have him in my life! he is just AWESOME!
My friend T. My friend T is my oldest friend from this bunch, we have been friends since I was like 16 years old. I can't write on here all the stuff that he means to me because I won't have enough room. All I can say is that he has a heart of gold and that he respects women and people and is a hard working awesome man! he has finally decided that he might want to get married, so he is on the look out for a suitable life partner. I love my friend so damn much! I will sometimes send him a message and ask him to take me out on a date because no one loves me, so he will take me out and we will talk, catch up and dance some salsa! and after I will always feel rejuvenated. I love him so much! he is truly special!
My work husband. My work husband is my friend that I see everyday and get mad at if he doesn't talk to me through out the day (I don't care if he is busy!). I love him because he gives me great advice and whenever I listen to him things go right. He calls himself my therapist and I call myself his. I joke to people that he is my husband but that it is perfectly ok that he has a girlfriend on the side (because he does have a girlfriend) when I am in a really great mood I will go into his office doing some sort of dance and he will look at me and say something like... OH HELL NO! what the hell did you do now? and we will both just laugh. Everyone knows that we are good friends who care about each other genuinely with no other interest at all. I am truly lucky to have a husband!
And then there is my SG! He is my spiritual guide! my lovely friend who I truly respect! he has introduced me to Yoga, to organic foods and to some really awesome ideas about life. He listens to me when I'm down and understands me as a person and never judges me and respects my individuality as I respect his. When he first met his current girlfriend and he told me he was thinking of not moving forward with her, I gave him a good talking to and now he tells me she is his best friend! I love my SG sooooo much! he is such a great boyfriend to her! he tells me all about the adventures he takes her on and the more I know him, the more I realize that the reason why I love him so dearly, is because he reminds me of me sometimes. I'm so simply blessed to have met him! we know each other now for about 4 years and when we met, he took me on a romantic date but I didn't see him in a romantic way, so because he is very mature, he also saw that we made more sense as just friends and we have been that ever since (I never even kissed him) we have been platonic friends all along. I'm so lucky to have my SG!
Then there is my friend Mr. Married man. I will call him that because he is married and if he wasn't married, he would be MINE! with him our friendship is a bit distant, we keep it distant because since I am very attracted to him, and him to me. I prefer not to see him much or talk to him much, yet whenever I have a serious serious decision to make or whenever I am feeling really down he is one of the first people I look for. I feel that he feels the same way about me and we both just have such respect for his marriage that we know to maintain things in a way that we can still be friends without letting the attraction that we share to get in the way. I have NEVER nor would I EVER do anything to disrespect his marriage because I understand my role in his life. But I love him very much because I respect him and appreciate who he is and I also know that when it comes to me, he only has my very best interest at heart. I am really lucky to know him and the fact that he is respectful to his wife makes me love him even more! There needs to be more men like him in this world!
Then there is my friend lovey! lovey is my good friend who is away in college. I met him also on a dating site and he and I started out with romantic interest for one another, but we soon realized that we made so much more sense as friends that we just needed to stay that. We tell each other everything about our most intimate things. Whenever I don't hear from him for a long time I will send him a message like.... Where's my lovey?? Lovey is the term that was used in the show Gilligan's Island (one of my favorite shows growing up) and I see him as my little lovey. It's really weird because he sees me as almost a mother figure and he respects me very much and I respect him. We have developed a great friendship in the course of this last year and whenever he is in town he will take me on a "date" and we will sit have some food and talk about all sorts of things, but our friendship is strictly platonic. He is my young angel! who is quite the ladies man!!! god help them all!
And last but not least there is my friend VA. I have never met him in person but he is really really cool. Now he and I aren't like the type of friends who talk often or communicate much, but actually I thought about calling this post my angels, when I thought about the role he plays in my life. He recently had a little girl (well he didn't have her but you know what I mean right?) he had a baby with a woman he had a fling with, but when he found out that she was pregnant he automatically did the right thing and took responsibility for his irresponsibility that of not practicing safe sex. However, although he had his baby girl due to being irresponsible, he has never been so happy in his life and the role I play in his life, is that I am one of those lucky people he shares his daughter with. I will randomly get text messages of pictures of his little angel and I have to say that when he does that, it brightens up my day! she is this incredible little princess who is now 6 months old and I have been lucky enough to watch her grow and watch him become a great daddy! I swear that it's almost as if he knows when I'm down because there are times that I will get a picture of his little princess just when I need it and it just brightens my life! He calls me New York and I just love it! he is such an awesome guy! how did I get so lucky?
So there you go journal. Who needs one man when I have 9! OH MY! I know that one day when I have a man to call my very own, some of these men will not play as big a role in my life as they do now, I also understand that loving all these individuals the way that I do, may, make a man that doesn't really know me uncomfortable about my relationships with them. However, the day I choose to call a man my own or the man that one day decides to partake in my life in a romantic way, this individual will be so sure of what he has, that he will never need to worry, because he will trust me and he will understand who I am and know me enough to know that I will never do anything to hurt him and I am also comfortable in letting him meet any one of my friends I wrote about on here because they are just that, my friends who I will not abandon simply because someone is now MY MAN.
Additionally, even when you are in a relationship with someone, you should not look to that person to fulfill every single friend role that you need (the person you are in a romantic relationship with, is also your "best friend") Dr. John Gray author of the book (men women and relationships) explains that many relationships don't work properly because we tend to depend on one person for all our emotional needs and that there is no one person that can fulfill every single need we have. However, once you understand that when you are IN LOVE it is different than loving others, and once you understand that you and your significant other are loyal to one another romantically and you trust each other. You can easily have a rewarding relationship and maintain your past friendships as long as you know the different role that each individual plays in your respective life.
The term "friend" is one that can be utilized to describe people who you feel fulfill any one of your emotional needs, the term friend in my opinion, doesn't necessarily have to have one exact meaning, but rather it is a broad term to utilize when describing people that are meaningful to you in different ways. The term friend is a term that to me, means this individual I am talking about is someone who I value in some way. I happen to love all people and I happen to have many friends, some close some not, yet they still partake in my life in some way and therefore, they are my angels on earth.
I found this article on "just friends" that I wanted to put on here, very interesting and almost seems obvious.
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=men-and-women-cant-be-just-friends&page=2
"And that is all I have to say about THAT!" ~ Forrest Gump
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJ_yQ02xwsM
Next is my awesome friend Chicho. I met Chicho over a year ago on Tagged (wow I have met some really great people on there come to think about it) Chicho initially approached me in a romantic way since Tagged is after all a dating site, but from the beginning I was honest with him and told him that I was not attracted to him that way and he told me that it was ok, that we could just be friends. I am aware that sometimes people think that staying friends is a good idea when you like someone romantically because they think they might have a chance of some sort if they stay friends (that is NOT true! and a really bad idea! don't be friends with someone you have romantic feelings for with hopes as it is not fair to you or the person) but with Chicho, I noticed immediately that he was capable of being a mature man and handling our friendship as a mature adult would. He understood that I was being honest and that I do not play games with people, he also understood that we had a great chemistry in that we had so much in common that it would be a bummer not to be able to maintain a platonic friendship with each other. I was really happy that he is mature with his feelings and that we could stay friends because he is really really awesome! he is intelligent and funny and easy going and just plain COOL! he is handsome and witty and educated and just great! I appreciate him very very much, because he never again brought up romance nor does he ever disrespect me in any way, he hears me out if I have a problem and I try to do the same. He tells me about the women he dates and I will tell him about my crazy man stories. We have met up a few times and just had a great time. I really love my friend and am proud of him because he is a kind hearted individual who loves photography and traveling and reading and being well rounded. He served our country in the military and is currently still serving his community by being a city councilman. He cares about people and has a great big heart! I'm truly lucky to have him in my life! he is just AWESOME!
My friend T. My friend T is my oldest friend from this bunch, we have been friends since I was like 16 years old. I can't write on here all the stuff that he means to me because I won't have enough room. All I can say is that he has a heart of gold and that he respects women and people and is a hard working awesome man! he has finally decided that he might want to get married, so he is on the look out for a suitable life partner. I love my friend so damn much! I will sometimes send him a message and ask him to take me out on a date because no one loves me, so he will take me out and we will talk, catch up and dance some salsa! and after I will always feel rejuvenated. I love him so much! he is truly special!
My work husband. My work husband is my friend that I see everyday and get mad at if he doesn't talk to me through out the day (I don't care if he is busy!). I love him because he gives me great advice and whenever I listen to him things go right. He calls himself my therapist and I call myself his. I joke to people that he is my husband but that it is perfectly ok that he has a girlfriend on the side (because he does have a girlfriend) when I am in a really great mood I will go into his office doing some sort of dance and he will look at me and say something like... OH HELL NO! what the hell did you do now? and we will both just laugh. Everyone knows that we are good friends who care about each other genuinely with no other interest at all. I am truly lucky to have a husband!
And then there is my SG! He is my spiritual guide! my lovely friend who I truly respect! he has introduced me to Yoga, to organic foods and to some really awesome ideas about life. He listens to me when I'm down and understands me as a person and never judges me and respects my individuality as I respect his. When he first met his current girlfriend and he told me he was thinking of not moving forward with her, I gave him a good talking to and now he tells me she is his best friend! I love my SG sooooo much! he is such a great boyfriend to her! he tells me all about the adventures he takes her on and the more I know him, the more I realize that the reason why I love him so dearly, is because he reminds me of me sometimes. I'm so simply blessed to have met him! we know each other now for about 4 years and when we met, he took me on a romantic date but I didn't see him in a romantic way, so because he is very mature, he also saw that we made more sense as just friends and we have been that ever since (I never even kissed him) we have been platonic friends all along. I'm so lucky to have my SG!
Then there is my friend Mr. Married man. I will call him that because he is married and if he wasn't married, he would be MINE! with him our friendship is a bit distant, we keep it distant because since I am very attracted to him, and him to me. I prefer not to see him much or talk to him much, yet whenever I have a serious serious decision to make or whenever I am feeling really down he is one of the first people I look for. I feel that he feels the same way about me and we both just have such respect for his marriage that we know to maintain things in a way that we can still be friends without letting the attraction that we share to get in the way. I have NEVER nor would I EVER do anything to disrespect his marriage because I understand my role in his life. But I love him very much because I respect him and appreciate who he is and I also know that when it comes to me, he only has my very best interest at heart. I am really lucky to know him and the fact that he is respectful to his wife makes me love him even more! There needs to be more men like him in this world!
Then there is my friend lovey! lovey is my good friend who is away in college. I met him also on a dating site and he and I started out with romantic interest for one another, but we soon realized that we made so much more sense as friends that we just needed to stay that. We tell each other everything about our most intimate things. Whenever I don't hear from him for a long time I will send him a message like.... Where's my lovey?? Lovey is the term that was used in the show Gilligan's Island (one of my favorite shows growing up) and I see him as my little lovey. It's really weird because he sees me as almost a mother figure and he respects me very much and I respect him. We have developed a great friendship in the course of this last year and whenever he is in town he will take me on a "date" and we will sit have some food and talk about all sorts of things, but our friendship is strictly platonic. He is my young angel! who is quite the ladies man!!! god help them all!
And last but not least there is my friend VA. I have never met him in person but he is really really cool. Now he and I aren't like the type of friends who talk often or communicate much, but actually I thought about calling this post my angels, when I thought about the role he plays in my life. He recently had a little girl (well he didn't have her but you know what I mean right?) he had a baby with a woman he had a fling with, but when he found out that she was pregnant he automatically did the right thing and took responsibility for his irresponsibility that of not practicing safe sex. However, although he had his baby girl due to being irresponsible, he has never been so happy in his life and the role I play in his life, is that I am one of those lucky people he shares his daughter with. I will randomly get text messages of pictures of his little angel and I have to say that when he does that, it brightens up my day! she is this incredible little princess who is now 6 months old and I have been lucky enough to watch her grow and watch him become a great daddy! I swear that it's almost as if he knows when I'm down because there are times that I will get a picture of his little princess just when I need it and it just brightens my life! He calls me New York and I just love it! he is such an awesome guy! how did I get so lucky?
So there you go journal. Who needs one man when I have 9! OH MY! I know that one day when I have a man to call my very own, some of these men will not play as big a role in my life as they do now, I also understand that loving all these individuals the way that I do, may, make a man that doesn't really know me uncomfortable about my relationships with them. However, the day I choose to call a man my own or the man that one day decides to partake in my life in a romantic way, this individual will be so sure of what he has, that he will never need to worry, because he will trust me and he will understand who I am and know me enough to know that I will never do anything to hurt him and I am also comfortable in letting him meet any one of my friends I wrote about on here because they are just that, my friends who I will not abandon simply because someone is now MY MAN.
Additionally, even when you are in a relationship with someone, you should not look to that person to fulfill every single friend role that you need (the person you are in a romantic relationship with, is also your "best friend") Dr. John Gray author of the book (men women and relationships) explains that many relationships don't work properly because we tend to depend on one person for all our emotional needs and that there is no one person that can fulfill every single need we have. However, once you understand that when you are IN LOVE it is different than loving others, and once you understand that you and your significant other are loyal to one another romantically and you trust each other. You can easily have a rewarding relationship and maintain your past friendships as long as you know the different role that each individual plays in your respective life.
The term "friend" is one that can be utilized to describe people who you feel fulfill any one of your emotional needs, the term friend in my opinion, doesn't necessarily have to have one exact meaning, but rather it is a broad term to utilize when describing people that are meaningful to you in different ways. The term friend is a term that to me, means this individual I am talking about is someone who I value in some way. I happen to love all people and I happen to have many friends, some close some not, yet they still partake in my life in some way and therefore, they are my angels on earth.
I found this article on "just friends" that I wanted to put on here, very interesting and almost seems obvious.
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=men-and-women-cant-be-just-friends&page=2
THANK YOU FRIENDS!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJ_yQ02xwsM
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