Dear Journal -
I am soo extremely exhausted, that coming on here to write to you further proves, my love and commitment to you and my writing. I feel as though I can not let you go that easily and that I simply must share with you certain things.
Yesterday was quite an eventful day, I bumped into someone who I I have been having a sort of love hate relationship now for nearly a year. The other night, I had told this person, that if I bumped into him on campus, I was going to smack him right across his face. Well, yesterday, I bumped into him and when I saw him, I figured I would go up to him to say hello, after all, I love him more then I hate him, or actually, I do not hate him at all. To make a long story extremely short, when he saw me, he got up from where he was sitting and walked away from me, shying away thinking I was indeed going to smack him in the face WTF!. I felt extremely sad, that he doesn't know me at all and that he actually thought I would indeed hit him.
I do not hit anyone, that Jazzy no longer exists. I am not violent anymore as I once was. I have changed much in the last few years and when I said I was going to smack him, I said it out of being upset with his behavior towards me. As he walked away from me not saying a single word, I did not know how to react, so I simply walked away towards the other direction. I would be lying if I say, that I wasn't extremely hurt by him. I walked to my class, as my eyes got watery and I wondered, what it was that I ever did to this person, for him to feel this anger towards me. As of yesterday, he is dead to me, a good friend who I shared many laughs with. Sometimes I guess it's better to allow people to just be and so I will most certainly avoid him at all cost. Yes, I know that I threatened him, but I also later said I would not do anything to him, he knew this. I remember him once walking down a set of stairs with me in school and him fearing I was going to harm him on the stairwell, really???? do I come across as that much of a crazy bitch?? Judgments!! this is what happens. Don't get me wrong though, if I have to defend myself, I would, but I don't go around slapping or cutting anyone. I guess it is what it is, I only hope one day, he will realize he had me all wrong.
Aside from that little very sad episode, I also came home to find my child with a huge cut on his finger and a broken wrist, he got hit by a car. It was a hit an run, I keep wondering who hit my child with his car and just drove away as if my child was some piece of nothing. At first I was extremely angry at this, later, as I thought about it, I felt sorry for this coward that did not have the guts to go back and check on my child. This person, would definitely get slapped by me or rather, there is no telling what I would do to this bastard, who left my child on a street without checking to see what he did to him. Luckily my baby is ok, and I will not even write anything about what if this or that, it serves no purpose to continue to think about the many possibilities.
I have sent this stranger, much love, because clearly that is what this person needs in their life, because if this person had just a bit of love in his heart, he would of came back to check on my baby. Life will take care of that for me and there is nothing that I need to do further, regarding this incident. Obviously, I made a police report about the incident, but I have a feeling that this case is closed. None the less, my heart is broken, that there can be people out there, that have no regard for another human life. God, what is happening to this world?
On a happier note, I absolutely love my two classes! both my professors are absolutely amazing and I am so excited about both topics. I still have to attend my third class which will be this Sunday and once I do so, I shall come back to you dear journal and tell you all about that as well.
Today I learned, that Psychology comes from a greek word which means Psyche = Soul or spirit and Logia - Study of science so basically Psychology is the science of the soul. Now, HOW FREAKING COOL IS THAT! I have to say, that after today, I fell deeper in love with my field of study, and I look forward to coming back to you my dear journal, and reporting many wonderful new things that I shall uncover this semester. Good night Journal!
Oh yeah one more thing, last night I learned that South Dakota, was under the ocean, 75 million years ago before the earth was struck by the Asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs. WOW! how cool is it to know random facts! I SIMPLY LOVE IT!
I am soo extremely exhausted, that coming on here to write to you further proves, my love and commitment to you and my writing. I feel as though I can not let you go that easily and that I simply must share with you certain things.
Yesterday was quite an eventful day, I bumped into someone who I I have been having a sort of love hate relationship now for nearly a year. The other night, I had told this person, that if I bumped into him on campus, I was going to smack him right across his face. Well, yesterday, I bumped into him and when I saw him, I figured I would go up to him to say hello, after all, I love him more then I hate him, or actually, I do not hate him at all. To make a long story extremely short, when he saw me, he got up from where he was sitting and walked away from me, shying away thinking I was indeed going to smack him in the face WTF!. I felt extremely sad, that he doesn't know me at all and that he actually thought I would indeed hit him.
I do not hit anyone, that Jazzy no longer exists. I am not violent anymore as I once was. I have changed much in the last few years and when I said I was going to smack him, I said it out of being upset with his behavior towards me. As he walked away from me not saying a single word, I did not know how to react, so I simply walked away towards the other direction. I would be lying if I say, that I wasn't extremely hurt by him. I walked to my class, as my eyes got watery and I wondered, what it was that I ever did to this person, for him to feel this anger towards me. As of yesterday, he is dead to me, a good friend who I shared many laughs with. Sometimes I guess it's better to allow people to just be and so I will most certainly avoid him at all cost. Yes, I know that I threatened him, but I also later said I would not do anything to him, he knew this. I remember him once walking down a set of stairs with me in school and him fearing I was going to harm him on the stairwell, really???? do I come across as that much of a crazy bitch?? Judgments!! this is what happens. Don't get me wrong though, if I have to defend myself, I would, but I don't go around slapping or cutting anyone. I guess it is what it is, I only hope one day, he will realize he had me all wrong.
Aside from that little very sad episode, I also came home to find my child with a huge cut on his finger and a broken wrist, he got hit by a car. It was a hit an run, I keep wondering who hit my child with his car and just drove away as if my child was some piece of nothing. At first I was extremely angry at this, later, as I thought about it, I felt sorry for this coward that did not have the guts to go back and check on my child. This person, would definitely get slapped by me or rather, there is no telling what I would do to this bastard, who left my child on a street without checking to see what he did to him. Luckily my baby is ok, and I will not even write anything about what if this or that, it serves no purpose to continue to think about the many possibilities.
I have sent this stranger, much love, because clearly that is what this person needs in their life, because if this person had just a bit of love in his heart, he would of came back to check on my baby. Life will take care of that for me and there is nothing that I need to do further, regarding this incident. Obviously, I made a police report about the incident, but I have a feeling that this case is closed. None the less, my heart is broken, that there can be people out there, that have no regard for another human life. God, what is happening to this world?
On a happier note, I absolutely love my two classes! both my professors are absolutely amazing and I am so excited about both topics. I still have to attend my third class which will be this Sunday and once I do so, I shall come back to you dear journal and tell you all about that as well.
Today I learned, that Psychology comes from a greek word which means Psyche = Soul or spirit and Logia - Study of science so basically Psychology is the science of the soul. Now, HOW FREAKING COOL IS THAT! I have to say, that after today, I fell deeper in love with my field of study, and I look forward to coming back to you my dear journal, and reporting many wonderful new things that I shall uncover this semester. Good night Journal!
Oh yeah one more thing, last night I learned that South Dakota, was under the ocean, 75 million years ago before the earth was struck by the Asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs. WOW! how cool is it to know random facts! I SIMPLY LOVE IT!
I love to read ur thoughts. Is the car accident a real story? I hope not :(
ReplyDeleteU have a gift I will continue to read ur blogs I simply love them!!! Muah Jazzy!!! Smooches c u soon!!! Love Lizzy